January 2010
Accustomed to His Face (but he no longer recognizes me)
By January of 2010, I was getting used to the idea of moving on with life without Glenn.
New Year. New Beginnings.
I had new friends, new habits, new books to read.
Yet, although I was looking forward to the future, fond memories of simple things that I had grown accustomed to would sometimes intrude upon my thoughts.
This picture is from Christmas Eve 2009. My oldest son had given me a ride to the airport so that I could fly to visit a friend in NY.
The obvious thing you see is one handsome young man. What you can't see is that he has just locked himself out of his car, engine running, with his mother's suitcase in the backseat!!!
-Just another funny story in my life.
The humor to this story continued in that when I returned from one of these trips, my son was a little late in picking me up. As I waited inside the terminal, there was a gentleman leaning against the wall, not far me. The man was steadily taking notice of me but just as steadily, I was ignoring him.
I had little time in my life for another guy who was probably nothing more than a wolf in sheep's clothing. This man was also apparently waiting for a ride. He did not have luggage or a coat, so I figured he worked there at the terminal. Just another strike against him; as involvement with another airline worker just did not appeal to me at the moment.
When my son called to say that he was within minutes of me, I walked outside the terminal to the family's usual pick up spot. And there my heart stopped. For I could see our Silverado coming along the lane. I knew it was Glenn, I know how he drives, and I knew the truck. And I got nervous that perhaps my son had 'set me up.' But my fears soon turned into amusement.
Glenn stopped, right there at our usual pick up spot, but didn't even look my way. He was looking toward the terminal doors. I looked that way, wondering if he was expecting to see me come out the doors. But no, instead, there was that man coming toward Glenn. I just could not believe the irony in my life!!!
Glenn got out of the pickup and walked around to open the passenger door. He was now within three feet of me, looked right at me, but had not recognized me.
I waited until the man had climbed into the back seat of the cab, and as Glenn closed the door I said, "Hi, Glenn." He turned toward me, tilting his head to greet me with a "Hi." But at the same time he looked puzzled, as if wondering if he knew me from somewhere. I said nothing more.
- When he realized it was me, he took a step back, with his hand still on the door latch, only now his motion backward was opening it instead of closing it. He almost seemed to be holding the truck door as a shield against me, stepping behind it for protection.
He quickly gathered his wits, and stepped forward to close the door again. With his back to me now, he asked if I was coming or going. I replied that I did not think it mattered to him, unless he was offering me a ride. To which he said, "No. Goodbye." Then he proceeded to check that the door was locked securely and walked around the rear to the driver's side.
As the truck pulled away, I kindly lifted my hand to wave at the man in the backseat. Who lifted his right arm in a feeble wave back, his lower jaw agape. Shocked, I suppose, that Glenn knew me.
I laughed to myself, imagining Glenn telling him that I was his "horrid ex-wife." And I imagined how shocked the man would be to hear that news, since he had been admiring me.
In fact, I had dressed so well for my travels that day that as I went through security at the NYC airport, the guard there noticed the suit jacket I had not removed. But then he regarded me, and just waved me through, with a nod. I felt like Jackie O at that moment! Very demure, graceful. Able to move through adversity like a Jedi knight in training!
So I imagined the man sitting in the backseat trying to make sense of Glenn 'trading me in' for Dena. I also imagined that the man had sat in the back because glenn still had to pick up Dena from the hanger and take her with them to the U.S. Airways Diversity Network function. Because it was around that time in February. And I remembered Dena's blog of how she had met up with glenn at the same function a year before.
And I imagined the stark contrast the man would have to comprehend if Glenn was indeed picking Dena up next.
And I was tickled that Glenn had stood three feet from me and did not even know who I was.
And I tried hard to remember if he had ever appreciated me for who I was.
And I wondered what might have happened if I had actually talked to that guy before Glenn picked him up!!
And as I stood there taking in all the parameters of the situation, my son pulled up.
No time for tears now!!
Just another affirmation that I would be alright, in spite of what I had grown accustomed to.
New Year. New Beginnings.
I had new friends, new habits, new books to read.
Yet, although I was looking forward to the future, fond memories of simple things that I had grown accustomed to would sometimes intrude upon my thoughts.
This picture is from Christmas Eve 2009. My oldest son had given me a ride to the airport so that I could fly to visit a friend in NY.
The obvious thing you see is one handsome young man. What you can't see is that he has just locked himself out of his car, engine running, with his mother's suitcase in the backseat!!!
-Just another funny story in my life.
The humor to this story continued in that when I returned from one of these trips, my son was a little late in picking me up. As I waited inside the terminal, there was a gentleman leaning against the wall, not far me. The man was steadily taking notice of me but just as steadily, I was ignoring him.
I had little time in my life for another guy who was probably nothing more than a wolf in sheep's clothing. This man was also apparently waiting for a ride. He did not have luggage or a coat, so I figured he worked there at the terminal. Just another strike against him; as involvement with another airline worker just did not appeal to me at the moment.
When my son called to say that he was within minutes of me, I walked outside the terminal to the family's usual pick up spot. And there my heart stopped. For I could see our Silverado coming along the lane. I knew it was Glenn, I know how he drives, and I knew the truck. And I got nervous that perhaps my son had 'set me up.' But my fears soon turned into amusement.
Glenn stopped, right there at our usual pick up spot, but didn't even look my way. He was looking toward the terminal doors. I looked that way, wondering if he was expecting to see me come out the doors. But no, instead, there was that man coming toward Glenn. I just could not believe the irony in my life!!!
Glenn got out of the pickup and walked around to open the passenger door. He was now within three feet of me, looked right at me, but had not recognized me.
I waited until the man had climbed into the back seat of the cab, and as Glenn closed the door I said, "Hi, Glenn." He turned toward me, tilting his head to greet me with a "Hi." But at the same time he looked puzzled, as if wondering if he knew me from somewhere. I said nothing more.
- When he realized it was me, he took a step back, with his hand still on the door latch, only now his motion backward was opening it instead of closing it. He almost seemed to be holding the truck door as a shield against me, stepping behind it for protection.
He quickly gathered his wits, and stepped forward to close the door again. With his back to me now, he asked if I was coming or going. I replied that I did not think it mattered to him, unless he was offering me a ride. To which he said, "No. Goodbye." Then he proceeded to check that the door was locked securely and walked around the rear to the driver's side.
As the truck pulled away, I kindly lifted my hand to wave at the man in the backseat. Who lifted his right arm in a feeble wave back, his lower jaw agape. Shocked, I suppose, that Glenn knew me.
I laughed to myself, imagining Glenn telling him that I was his "horrid ex-wife." And I imagined how shocked the man would be to hear that news, since he had been admiring me.
In fact, I had dressed so well for my travels that day that as I went through security at the NYC airport, the guard there noticed the suit jacket I had not removed. But then he regarded me, and just waved me through, with a nod. I felt like Jackie O at that moment! Very demure, graceful. Able to move through adversity like a Jedi knight in training!
So I imagined the man sitting in the backseat trying to make sense of Glenn 'trading me in' for Dena. I also imagined that the man had sat in the back because glenn still had to pick up Dena from the hanger and take her with them to the U.S. Airways Diversity Network function. Because it was around that time in February. And I remembered Dena's blog of how she had met up with glenn at the same function a year before.
And I imagined the stark contrast the man would have to comprehend if Glenn was indeed picking Dena up next.
And I was tickled that Glenn had stood three feet from me and did not even know who I was.
And I tried hard to remember if he had ever appreciated me for who I was.
And I wondered what might have happened if I had actually talked to that guy before Glenn picked him up!!
And as I stood there taking in all the parameters of the situation, my son pulled up.
No time for tears now!!
Just another affirmation that I would be alright, in spite of what I had grown accustomed to.